Only a Few More Days Until the Second Worst Day in U.S. History

Trump’s inauguration is almost upon us. I’m both sick to my stomach and eager to see what it’ll be like. A total disaster? A success? Let’s take a look at his musical guests. 3 Doors Down. Toby Keith. Damn, man. That’s a fucking low bar.

Apparently 5,000 bikers will be forming a wall of “meat” between them and “violent” protestors. Man, fuck bikers. They can live however they want. It’s totally fine by me. Honestly, it’s kinda cool. I’m aware of my clumsiness; I know I couldn’t ride a motorcycle without killing myself.

But, really. These people. Such a silly demographic. Conservative, state-hating, drug smuggling, violence endorsing manbaby hoodlums.